Date Night

When we are single, we date others to find a potential partner. Then when we find the one we are going to call partner, we don’t need to date anymore, right? Wrong!! A healthy relationship depends on healthy communication and quality time spent together. It is a common phenomenon that couples get married and have children and when the children grow up and “leave the nest”, the couple that started all of this look across the table at each other and wonder who they are looking at. Raising kids is a big job. But so is a healthy relationship. Making time for the one that you love makes them feel heard, understood, and loved. It also reminds them that they are important to you. So Date Night is more critical with your partner than with your potential partner.

Just what is Date Night? The critical part of Date Night is the communication. It is sharing thoughts, feelings and ideas with each other that the typical hectic life we lead does not always allow us to do. Date Night can include a movie, a play, a concert, or anything else we need to sit quietly through, so long as it also includes discussion time before or after. Date Night also has no real budget. It can be a special occasion for which we pull out all the stops or it can be a picnic in the garage. Once again it is about the quality time spent together and the communication that occurs.

It’s important to note that for parents, conversation about the kids is strictly off limits. Conversation about the kids is for Parents Night, not Date Night.

It is also important that both parties have plenty of time to speak. Nobody enjoys a date when one person does all of the talking. If you need help getting your Date Night routine started, come see me.

What are your thoughts about Date Night?

Rosemary Behrens, Ph.D. Family Counselor